What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger; stand a little taller. Kelly Clarkson
Paraphrasing a sentiment Friedrich Nietzsche expressed nearly a century earlier, the title track of Kelly Clarkson’s album Stronger stands as a modern anthem of resilience. The song was a massive hit, topping the Billboard Hot 100 and cementing itself as one of Clarkson’s signature tracks.
There’s something raw and powerful about the notion of adversity, that, if we allow it, can push us beyond our perceived limits. We don't have to look very far to understand why this notion resonates so deeply within us.
The Hero’s Journey: A Universal Truth
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.Chinese Proverb
The Hero’s Journey, a narrative structure outlined by Joseph Campbell in The Hero with a Thousand Faces, is a storytelling blueprint that has stood the test of time. It appears in myths, books, and films—from The Odyssey to Star Wars and Harry Potter. The storyline typically follows a hero who embarks on a transformative adventure, faces trials, and returns forever changed.
This trope is so powerful because it mirrors real life. Growth through adversity is not just a fictional arc—it’s the foundation of many real-life success stories like Walt Disney’s.
Walt Disney: A Real-Life Hero’s Journey
Just reading about Disney's litany of failures is exhausting—from a difficult childhood to multiple bankruptcies to employers and co-workers stealing his creative work (long before copyright laws protected artists). Yet, through every setback, he persisted. He kept pushing forward, eventually creating what many now consider The Happiest Place on Earth.
Disney himself acknowledged the power of adversity in shaping his success:
All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all the troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me. You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.
How Adversity Can Be a Catalyst for Change
Adversity strips away pretense. When you feel like you have nothing left to lose, you are more willing to take risks and put in the effort needed to make a change. This is why so many people from difficult backgrounds push themselves harder—they know what rock bottom feels like and never want to go back.
But is the counterpoint valid? Is struggle a prerequisite for success?
Is Adversity Essential for Drive and Purpose?
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
History, science, and personal experience all seem to suggest that adversity isn’t just a challenge—it’s often the very thing that gives us drive and purpose.
It is rare to find someone fully satisfied with their circumstances and has the same fire and energy to disrupt the status quo. When everything is comfortable, the urgency to change or improve diminishes and sometimes even disappears.
Even something as mundane as Exercise uses the principle of adversity. When we contract muscles (exercise), it causes microscopic tears in the fibers that the body then repairs with stronger muscles. So, it’s fair to say that the prerequisite for becoming stronger is enduring the breakdown of existing structures—an experience we can all agree is far from pleasant.
None of us, in our right minds, would willingly trade a comfortable existence just to (borrowing Disney’s words) “get kicked in the teeth.” Forget welcoming adversity—we usually do everything we can to avoid even the slightest hint of it.
So, how do we grow and improve? This is where wisdom comes into play.
Learning from Others: The Power of Wisdom
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself. Eleanor Roosevelt.
Here’s an important point—we don’t have to personally endure every hardship to learn from it. Wisdom comes from absorbing the lessons of those who have faced adversity before us. Of course, that’s easier said than done.
But if there’s one takeaway from this post, it’s to embrace the idea that we don’t have to make every mistake ourselves to learn from it.
In Short
So, the next time life challenges you, look for the silver lining. And take it a step further—recognize that resilience can be built without experiencing every hardship firsthand.
Every story of someone battling cancer is a reminder to prioritize your health and well-being today.
Every story of an unexpected loss is a call to love more deeply right now.
Every story of financial ruin is a lesson in the importance of planning wisely and living within our means.
Every story of a dream unfulfilled is a push to take action today rather than waiting for the elusive “right time.”
And when adversity does strike, see it for what it is—resistance training for your soul, the fire that tempers steel, the storm that shapes the oak tree.
I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship... but I’d really prefer to be on dry land. Louisa May Alcott